The Lost Summer

This summer because without changing eating habits I gained 30 lbs in one month. I gave in to doctor recommendations. 1) "They" put me on insulin - shots for diabetes depending on the level of my blood sugar. I have to prick and record daily how high it is. I can’t keep it low no matter how little I eat. Shots aren’t fun. I have (re) lost the 30 pounds.

2) "They" decided I should do a sleep test, finger first, and found that at night at times I only get 50% of the oxygen my body needs thus causing, startled wake ups multiple times during the night, night sweats, headaches in the morning. A "sleep study" and results and "they" recommend a chin strap to keep my mouth shut, and a CPAP that makes me look like Darth Vader at night but keeps me breathing at recommended levels.

Trying to do better, be better and get better, I purchased expensive compression hose to keep the water from collecting in my legs and help me treat the constant pain on the bottom of my right foot that moves from side to side and top to bottom without the covering or creams.
The above events coupled with skin cancer at the right eye resulting in bills, after insurance I must pay eating up my small savings, or the insulin, affected my depression medication. Tears and anger struggling to be constantly pleasant and positive and keep my emotions under wraps has made me tired. "They" gave me a new anti-depressant but it takes a while to work effectively.

When Sheri purchased a truck from Brent Brown, the bend over backwards guy, I got to be co-signer. I never trust a salesman. This one was particularly smooth. Things went wrong and on Tuesday afternoon in good form, I bantered with her salesman, his comment with pouty face, "I feel like I am being attacked, I think I will step out" sent me over the edge. I got up and walked out. True to form I chatted with any other anonymous salesman outside where I was seated. One said something about excellent service, and I said "that more than we are getting"
Wednesday Sheri was told that they would no longer do business with her because her mother was badmouthing a salesman, unless her mother would write a letter of apology. Depression in full swing I pounded out a weepy, apology and cried all the way home.

Now it is the day after, there are a few tears, nausea, headache, but I went to three movies with Jeannea yesterday and it is almost noon. September is knocking and fall wants in. May it be more gentle than summer.